My boyfriend. He asked if I was off my period and this is how he indirectly described it..
SATAN’S SACRIFICIAL WATERFALL
i knew that the media was unreliable but i never imagined it would be this bad
Do you ever think about the word ‘can’t’
Like, when you say, “Why can’t you get me some ice cream?”
You’re really saying, “Why can not you get me some ice cream?”
How have I gone through my entire life as a writer and not realized this
I had a similar epiphany with “Don’t you dare” being “Do not you dare.”
English is weird.
Forever grateful that English is my first language.
This is the best thing ever.
oh my sweet lord.
i can never take anything seriously ever again.
OH MY GOD I JUST DROPPED MY PHONE
Guys guys… MATT-MAN!
Supernatural - Nothing is aliens, everything is mystical
Doctor Who - Nothing is mystical, everything is aliens
Sherlock - Nothing is aliens or mystical, real life is really that scary and depressing.
If there was a Superwholock cross over:
Sam and Dean would literally shit themselves. The Doctor would be so confused AND excited. And I’m pretty sure Sherlock would spontaneously burst into flames.
And that’s why I’d watch it…
why am i awake
because you don’t need beauty sleep you’re already so beautiful
On the other hand, my nose flaring abilities are pretty good
For some reason I thought about this a lot as a kid
Pain is not exclusive to humans.
this genuinely makes my heart hurt
I really dislike when people say animals aren’t smart, or that they can’t feel emotions.
Sorry to rain on your parade but… While true, these are not emotions of sadness. These are emotions of dominance.
This isn’t a bird mourning over a dead bird.
This is a male bird raping the corpse of its rival to show dominance so that the chick birds will come mate with him and other males don’t step in his territory looking for mates.
Birds are fucking brutal man.
At first I thought this was a joke, but now that I see you’re serious I’m actually embarrassed for you. And disappointed, but let’s get to that later.
The pictures here belong to photographer Wilson Hsu, and if you knew the first thing about birds (which you obviously don’t), you’d be able to tell that the deceased bird is a female due to its more desaturated plumage and shorter tail feathers. Here, let’s post the coloured version to confirm, because tumblr has some sort of bizarre fetish for making everything black and white.
There goes your first point.
If you knew the second thing about birds, you’d be able to identify this species as a Barn swallow. And while you are correct in your assumption that the males are fairly territorial, they also mate for life and are fiercely dedicated to their female counterpart. Barn swallows, along with most small birds, are actually physically incapable of any sort of penetrative sex, because they have a cloaca instead of a penis. Mating is done by passing a packet of sperm from the male’s cloaca into the female’s, not by inserting a penis into a vagina. Necrophilia in this species is completely unheard of, and would be a complete waste.
So if we take all this information I’ve just told you, and couple it up with the fact that Wilson Hsu’s entire collection of these photos is uploaded online, which vividly depicts a male Barn Swallow trying to rouse his mate which has just died, we can infer you know literally nothing about the species as a whole, didn’t even bother to look up where the pictures were from, and are deliberately spreading misinformation for the sake of looking COOL N’ EDGY on tumblr dot com.
Normally I wouldn’t get so heated about this sort of thing, but that’s just stupid as hell.
Now that was a first class read *applause*
I have begun Full-Shave November.
This is fucking awful. HOW DO YOU DO THIS????
I was in the shower shaving for like… 45 minutes, and I STILL had to forgo shaving one of my legs because I was concerned I was running late for lunch (it turns out I wasn’t, but whatever).
I also ruined my razor, because I didn’t think to trim any of my hair first, but that’s okay.
Also look at all that fucking hair. There’s so much of it. I had no idea I had that much hair on me.
Tomorrow I will shave my left leg and run clean-up on basically everywhere else (it’s pretty patchy).
Aren’t you supposed to grow a mustache? what the fuck is full shave november.
The opposite of No Shave November. Lots of women get flak for participating in No Shave November and letting their body hair grow out (I can’t find the post with a bunch of screencapped tweets about it, but this is the next best thing), but the vast majority of guys (myself included) have absolutely no idea what a pain feeling like you have to shave your body hair is like. So, for the entirety of the month, I will be shaving my legs, chest, and armpits on a regular basis (as well as my usual regimen of shaving my face).
This idea. I like it. Another.
do you ever think about the money you don’t have and you just
"Thor and Loki"
deleted scene from Thor (2011)
All together now… “Awwwwwwwwwwwwww”